Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Motherhood to Me

There is a May Mom Blog Tour going on this month because, well, moms deserve more than one day in May.

If you missed yesterday's spot on the tour, you can find it at Anime's Musings.

I agreed to do the May Mom Blog Tour because... actually... I didn't so much agree to do it, but more accurately I agreed to have my good friend Christine email me info about it. I procrastinated in opening her attachments and before long I was included in an email to all the moms with their assigned dates, including mine. O_o While she swears it was an oversight, I think Christine assigned me a date as a result of trickery on her part, to get me roped in. She'll never admit to it of course. Christine, I love you to pieces (seriously, she's one of my favorite people) and am truly honored you wanted to include me in this fantastic group of moms.

Motherhood is a funny thing. It used to be a word that caused anxiety and perhaps even bile to rise inside me. When I married nearly 15 years ago my husband and I vowed never to have kids. Who wants a bunch of snot-nosed kids anyway? We didn't want to share each other with anyone else and wanted the advantages of a double-income, no kids family.

What changed? We both gradually warmed to the idea, especially when I pictured myself as a lonely old widow in a nursing home, without anyone to visit me. Hey whatever it takes, right?

Not long after we agreed God would probably strike us down with kids (our exact words), I got pregnant with our now 11 year old son Haven.

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Life was smooth sailing for us, until our attempts at a second child brought us heartache in the form of several miscarriages. We wanted more kids badly... had a 4 bedroom house and a minivan, and just couldn't manage to have another baby.

Then one day it hit both of us. Maybe we're not able to have another child because there's another baby out there that belongs in our family. So we started the adoption process. A year and a half later, an amazing young woman chose us to parent her baby. And so our family grew again with our now almost 7 year old son Seamus.

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That little baby boy healed our hearts and brought us so much joy. But our family didn't feel complete just yet.

We turned to International Adoption and adopted a baby girl from Ethiopia, who is our now 5 year old daughter Marlie. From the moment we arrived home with her, our family felt complete.

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I look back on those first few years of marriage and try to recall that person I used to be. I don't think I'd be friends with that version of myself. We have nothing in common. Sure, I wouldn't be supporting the pharmaceutical companies like I am now, but what a boring life that early version of me would have had. Though I have been changed so much through Motherhood, I myself wouldn't change a thing about where this journey to family has taken me. And I wouldn't trade these three amazing children for the world.

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Don't forget to check out tomorrow's stop on the May Mom Blog Tour! You will find it at: Yeah. Good Times.


  1. OMG, I have tears. I love love LOVE you and your family to pieces! I'm so glad something clicked and changed your minds. Thanks for letting us see the beautiful pictures! <3


  2. Haven, Seamus and Marlie are going to the coolest memory boxes between Marshall's gorgeous photos of them (seriously, they could go straight into a magazine) and your beautiful words about them.

    So much love in the purple house! :)

  3. AMAZING mom & AMAZING family! Great post and I am very excited to stalk....i mean read more about you!

    I love this May Mom Blog Hop as it has opened my eyes to soooo many more amazing women!

  4. I will admit to NOTHING!! HA!

    You know I had to drag you in with us, not just because you are a great mom, but because you one of my favorite people, too! I think, I'm not sure, but I think you may be the only adoptive parent on our tour and I wanted you to be the voice....really, who better than you?!

    I so LOVED hearing this story because there's a lot of us, including me, that didn't think we wanted kids and then we did. It's a strange thing to have these adorable lil faces change us so much. All 3 of your kids are growing into fantastic little people because of how much you care about them. They are so lucky to have you. So what if we aren't perfect? We do our best and that counts!

    Thank you so much, sweetie! Love you!!! <3